Kiwiana - Years 1-8 (Primary/Intermediate)

A Musical in two acts, 10 scenes: Music and Lyrics by Dr David McMillan.

1.       Synopsis

Kiwiana is an opportunity to relive a slice of New Zealand life in the 1970s and 1980s. Through a series of fun and humorous songs, children experience the world their grandparents grew up in. A time before the internet, smart phones and weekend shopping. When Fredd Dagg ruled the TV, Holden cars cruised the motorways, and the Silver Fern train was the main transport link between Auckland and Wellington.

2.       The Story

Poppa Snodgrass is in hospital after collapsing into a coma. Cuts to health spending mean that if he does not regain consciousness within the next 24 hours, his publicly funded medical care will cease. The Snodgrass family engage the services of a crazy Kiwi inventor (Professor Windbottom) who has developed a prototype machine to enable families to experience important memories in a patient’s life. What follows is a series of memories re-enacted in song, that could only be experienced in New Zealand.

Professor Windbottom explains to the family how he created his invention ((Song 1. Number 8 Wire). The first significant memory recovered is when Poppa Snodgrass’ twins are born and his dream that they’ll captain the Silver Ferns and All Blacks (Song 2. Hold onto the Faith). However, as the twins grow up it becomes evident that sport is not where their passions lie. His son (Aaron, a music teacher) is inspired by the tales of Fredd Dagg and lives on a lifestyle block owner with his pampered sheep (Song 3. She’ll be Right). His daughter (Kelly) devotes her life to promoting animal rights (Song 4. There’s a Weta in my Gumboot). The first half concludes with Poppa Snodgrass reminiscing about his beloved Holden Kingswood (HQ) which he has owned since new in 1973 (Song 5. Holden HQ).

As the family’s desperation intensifies, they embrace a raft of increasingly bizarre interventions. Meanwhile the memory machine continues to work successfully. Camping holidays at the local D.O.C. camping ground result in an unromanticised recollection of the quintessential Kiwi camping experience (Song 6. The Long Drop). Poppa Snodgrass is an avid train buff and as an annual ‘pilgrimage’, he took Aaron and Kelly on the Silver Fern train between Auckland and Wellington. (Song 7. Main Trunk Line).

Long summer holidays, with days spent between the beach and homegrown entertainment are recalled (Song 8. Kiwi Summer). As Poppa Snodgrass’ deadline approaches, Nana Snodgrass decides that she must share with her family, the darkest family secret. Despite a 50 year grudge against the Aussies (Song 9. Keep Your Underarms to Yourself), Poppa Snodgrass is actually Australian by birth!

As the family struggle to deal with the earth shattering revelation, the hospital staff advise that time is up, and the life support system must be switched off. The only remaining option is for the family to pay privately for ongoing life support at a cost of $40,000 per fortnight. Nana Snodgrass is beyond desperate, but they have no savings to pay for the ongoing treatment. Ina last ditch effort, Kelly suggests that they sell Poppa’s Holden HQ to pay for two more weeks of care. This suggestion is outrageous enough to awaken Poppa Snodgrass from his coma. The family and hospital staff celebrate Poppa’s miraculous recovery (Song 10. Darkest Before the Dawn).

3.       Scenes and Musical Numbers:

ACT ONE

Memories – Number 8 Wire

Maternity Ward – Hold onto the Faith

On the Farm – She’ll be Right

Bedroom Zoo – There’s a Weta in my Gumboot

The Golden Holden – Holden HQ

ACT TWO

Intrepid Camping – The Long drop

Wellington Bound – The Main Trunk Line

Summer Holidays – Kiwi Summer

Play by the Rules – Keep your Underarms to Yourself

Back from the Brink – Darkest Before the Dawn

4.       Two Script Options

You have two script options (both provided as part of your overall licence). The first script (entire/large school version) is designed to maximise the opportunity for a large number of children to have speaking parts (70+ one line participants, 16 main characters and 14 one scene characters).

The second script (small/senior school version) removes the one line characters and reduces the number of children required for speaking parts (16 main characters and 8 one scene characters).

The songs and storyline remain the same in both versions.

 4.1 Entire/Large School Script:

Main Characters (16)

Poppa Snodgrass, Poppa Snodgrass (junior), Nana Snodgrass, Aaron Snodgrass, Kelly Snodgrass, Matron Smythe (narrator), Snowy (narrator), Dr Clutterbuck, Nurse Rose, Major Kutz, Professor Windbottom, Maximus, Minimus, Glutimus, Doug Graves, Arthur Minute.

One Scene Characters (14)

Maternity nurse, Rugby commentator, Netball commentator, Fred Dagg, Head Protester, Agnus Minute, DOC Ranger, Grandad, Shaman Carbooti, Train conductor, Business passenger 1, Business passenger 2, Screaming toddler, Passenger 2, Crystal Cleary, Summer Sizzler Mum, Summer Sizzler Dad, Rodney Rooster, Brian McKechnie.

Chorus/ensemble (9 groups (preferably 10+ in each group - minimum of 3))

Backyard Inventors, All Blacks and Silver Ferns, The Daggs, Animal Welfare Activists, Holden Club, D.O.C. Campers, Train Passengers, Summer Sizzlers, Aussie Cricketers.

4.2 Small School/Senior School Script

Main Characters (16)

Poppa Snodgrass, Poppa Snodgrass (junior), Nana Snodgrass, Aaron Snodgrass, Kelly Snodgrass, Matron Smythe (narrator), Snowy (narrator), Dr Clutterbuck, Nurse Rose, Major Kutz, Professor Windbottom, Maximus, Minimus, Glutimus, Doug Graves, Arthur Minute.

One Scene Characters (8)

Maternity nurse, Fred Dagg, Head Protester, Agnus Minute, DOC Ranger, Shaman Carbooti, Train conductor, Crystal Cleary, Rodney Rooster.

Chorus/ensemble (9 groups (preferably 5+ in each group - minimum of 3))

Backyard Inventors, All Blacks and Silver Ferns, The Daggs, Animal Welfare Activists, Holden Club, D.O.C. Campers, Train Passengers, Summer Sizzlers, Aussie Cricketers.

5.       Orchestration

Backing tracks – choice of with or without BVs.